This will be the post that gets an ugly anonymous comment. (All real bloggers get them.) I can feel it. I have to write it. It is not about a blog or bloggers who link to a couple of memes I am aware of that have to do with what I am about to say. I think the internet has room for all different beliefs. I think they are on trend rather than responsible for the basis of the trend in thinking.
What I have to share today is fueled by my real life experience.
Women tend to get hung up in the idea of not being adequate to the task before them. Tasks. We have to do like the cologne ad from the 70s…”bring home the bacon, fry it up in the pan, and never let him forget he’s a man.”
Actually, the ad was based on a remake of a song (the writer’s grandchildren will probably emerge and sue me. They can have all the money I’ve made off the blog. I’ll dig through the bottom of my purse.)
We get hung up.
When we’re small, the only expectations we have to deal with are those of our parents; we don’t have any for ourselves, yet. As we grow, we add those of teachers and peers. At some point, we begin to feel expectations for ourselves, but they’re freighted with what others expect of us. As we become adults, we hope to be productive citizens, adding the expectations of employers, employees, a spouse and the culture to the load we bear.
I’ve been seeing and hearing a whisper on the wind of something I believe will become a movement. It’s on coffee mugs and tote bags. Blogs and Devotional books…
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
I think what this is attempting to say is, “Do what you can and don’t worry about the rest”.
Maybe, “Don’t carry around others’ expectations,”…which are both good things. If that’s what you’re trying to say, say it.
If I’m enough, I wouldn’t need anyone else. Isolation makes people lose perspective. We’ve seen it in a lot of different ways, from our crazy uncle to people who shoot guns into crowds.
This kind of thinking is arrogant. “I am all I need.” Bit of a slap in the face to those who support you and take up your slack.
We need others. Husband or wife, kids, faith community, neighbors (ever locked yourself out of your own house? At night?).
It’s difficult to reconcile self-sufficiency with scripture. Jesus Christ, Himself, had helpers.
What would we do without each other? I don’t know what I would’ve done without my blog friends over the last three years. I don’t know what I’d do without my IRL friend, CMK; she’s like an older sister who felt like mom spoiled me too much. Sometimes, that’s just what I need.
Today, I need a physical therapist, a grocer and a curriculum publisher. Yesterday, I needed a doctor, a pharmacist, and the gal hanging out the drive-thru at the Taco Bell. Tomorrow, I will go out of the house at 9:30 p.m. with the gals, to help decorate for a wedding for a gal who doesn’t have family to help her. Last week, we shopped the thrift store that benefits the battered women’s shelter. A dress we donated was in the display, while my daughter located Hilfiger khakis for $8.
If I’m enough, how come It Takes A Village?
I’m not enough. If I was, I wouldn’t need Jesus. I wouldn’t need to go out for girl’s night out. Or to go to a blog conference or to church or homeschool co-op.
I am so terribly grateful to be less than I need.