Just Two Little Words

A few weeks ago, my mentor lost her mother-in-law.  While she was out of town, I attended a birth in her place.

The lovely couple I had the privilege to serve were from another country.  They spoke beautiful-lilting-better-grammar-than-I-do-in-my-mother-tongue, and lyrical sounding Spanish.

Calm and beautiful people who were “ready-to-have-this-baby”.

Early in the evening, one said to the other, “Don’t complain.”

Wait. What?

1) I didn’t hear any complaint.

2) The hearer didn’t get his/her back up in offense.

In that moment, I learned a lesson I didn’t think I’d forget, but before long, the other spouse said it to the one who’d said it the first time,

“Don’t complain.”

It had become profound to me.  I didn’t recognize the complaint the second time either, but the partner did.  At this point, though we’d known each other 2 or 3 hours, I knew I had learned a life lesson.

But it wasn’t until this week, that I put it all together.

At our post-partum visit, he said it to her again, quipping, “Don’t complain; don’t complain. {laughs} Be more like me.” It was light hearted humor and she received the message with grace.

I hadn’t heard a complaint this time either, but suddenly I realized…

She had on of the shortest delivery times of anyone I had ever seen. (I met her in the lobby at the hospital .7 mi. from my house at 7:00p.m. and was in my bed going to sleep before midnight).

She was happy with her spouse, her baby, her life.

She had prepared herself for birth with information, nutrition, exercise and emotional support of friends and family.

She is a person, described by my mentor,”who tries to be calm and surround herself with calmness”.

Don’t complain.

There is no chance I will ever forget.




  1. That’s some pretty solid stuff there.

    I like that. And I think I’m gonna type that out and pin it up on the wall of my cubicle. So I will remember.

    I sure do my share sometimes. And really, if I think back over the things I complain about, they’re still there whether I complain or not. The outcome is still the same, the events don’t change…just my heart and my attitude. And not for the best.

    I like this. This is good. Really good. You always make me think.

    Love you.

  2. So more of a reminder than a reprimand. Nice.

I love it when you sass me. Please leave a comment.

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