It’s all coming unraveled.
I had a separate facebo*k identity for the purpose of the blog. I wasn’t shutting down the adoption blog (I used to be pretty good at this), but, dabbled in anonymity. Strangely, I seem to be pretty much back there, though that wasn’t my intention. But fb wouldn’t let me add another blog page to my regular account when I found that anonymity made me mad. Really, really mad.
For several months, no one in my real life knew about the other facebo*k page. Then I got up the courage to share the page with a number of people who were very respectful about my ‘false face’.
Periodically, I would check in on them from the blog persona page and forget that stuff needs to be separate. Or I’d post my link to the blog page and move over to my household page and link myself, accidentally. The irony is unintentional.
There is no hard evidence anyone EVER checked on of those links.
Except a little paranoia.
Until July. The youth pastor commented. And to be fair, that may have been a Twitter hit and not an FB one.
Then the girls got Facebook.
You want to talk about some Facebook loving. They were splashing my links all over the place. If I linked while Emma was on, she would like the link before she had a chance to read it. It could have been something hugely personal and embarrassing, I suppose. It would take her a long time to figure it out. She is just so in love with Facebook.
The deal is. This semi- anonymity has made me weird. I did it so I could say what I need to say without fear of reprisal, rebuke, or rejection.
That doesn’t work.
I’ve been doing something Mickey describes in sports. I’ve been playing the ‘prevent defense’. Not playing to win; playing not to lose.
I’ve been equivocating. Holding back. No one cares what a fence rider says.
I’ve been pandering to a comment. Hard evidence someone read the entire post. Site visits are delectable, but comments are better than that.
Fifty Shades better.
Am I wrong?
Emma was pretty good to remove her posts about the blog. I, however, couldn’t remember to check where I was logged in before I commented to her. Now, I’ve gotten friend requests from IRL people. I accepted the first one. A friend of Mickey’s that I kind of don’t like because he’s funnier than I am and he doesn’t laugh at my jokes. I’m sitting on two. One from a boy in Mickey’s Sunday school class. The other? The headmaster of the Independent Study Program through which the girls will get their diplomas. Maybe (but that’s another post).
Friendship on Facebook scarcely equals site visits. Apparently only bloggers read blogs. No one is going to care if I have a separate Facebook page. A lot of people we know have them for all sorts of reasons.
And how big is my ego if I think any of this matters.
When the youth pastor commented, Mickey said, “You better check and see what else he may have read.”
Thanks for your support, Honey.
I did check. I decided to stand by it all. Any changes I made were related to the post I read about a blogger who gave credit on a photo and still got sued. And blinding pain and a reaction to a medication.
So welcome, IRL people.
The content stands.
Feel free to comment.
You know how I like that.