Musings on the Mind of a Nine Year-Old Boy

The boy, you see, is new.

He is the newest addition to our family, and a totally new thing to me, as I never occupied the same home as a boy-child, until he arrived three years ago.

He also happened to join us when the girls were 13.  Merging into the fast lane on smart talk and personal drama.

He has at times in the past asked, in tears, when dad was coming home, because he, “Just needed some dude time.”

With time, he’s grown quietly patient.  Waiting until Fridays, when he can pretty much indulge himself in Khan Academy to his heart’s content.  And he and I run around and do errands and whatever.

Most times, he is a silent observer to an endless female discourse on life.

I wonder what goes through his mind….

If one more woman tells me not to look while she marches through the hallway dripping in a towel; so help me.  Cover up.  Don’t yell at me.”

One of these days, these two will be out of the house, and I’ll have a lot of good years of eating all the sweets in the house.  By myself.

Yeah.  Piss her off on Thursday late so I have to deal with her all day Friday.  That’s nice.  Thanks.”

One of these days, you’ll bring a guy home.  I know a lot of things, and I have an incredibly humorous delivery that could keep you single well into your forties.  It’s a good thing I’m motivated to get you out of the house, so I can get a taste of freaking cake.”

I don’t know what PMS is, exactly, but I’m thinking of getting my Ph.D in it.

“The Pamprin is in the medicine chest in the half bath.  But no one asked me.”

Gah, if they would just shut up.”

Ohm Eye Gash. Stop watching me eat!!!!”

I’m not kidding. Stop.”

Who will deliver me from this estrogen-soaked, tear-dripping, bra draped, sweet & salty-alternating existence?”

I wonder if Emma would like me to share with her.”

“Mercy likes this placemat; I’ll leave it for her.”

“Dad is wearing blue today; I will, too.

“Mom is not feeling well, I’m going to make her laugh.”

“I love going to [any activity we do].”

“I love Nutella.”

“I love Emma.”

“Mercy is so pretty.”

“I hope I grow as big as Dad someday.”

“I just love Mom.” (He told me this while we watched Jeopardy tonight.)

He kind of plays it close to the vest.  I wonder what he’s really thinking when he can’t get a word in edgewise.





  1. He just needed some dude time. That is precious.

    Bless his heart. He’s a brave little dude to tackle all that estrogen like a pro!

  2. Boys… They are so totally worth it.

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